AWAS: “transformer is under construction”

Posted: November 23, 2009 in ~mind-blogging~
Tags: , , ,

بســـــــم الله الرحمان الرحيم

I’M trying to transforming myself into something else better. InsyaAllah. Thanks to all da’ie outta here… for never give up in spreading Allah words and His Rasul trusts to his ummat. MasyaAllah, Allah is the Most Forgiver, The Most Truthful, The Most Reliable… He never left me all tis while. But, always, it is me whom often failed to reply the calls.

All those efforts … hopefully its working…to inspire me. So that I’ll be able to encourage (perhaps persuading) myself to choose this path…the right path…  forever… which I’m as a Muslim supposed to b… since long time ago…. I’m kinda wasting my time… for so long… May Allah forgives me for the reckless life that I’ve led before (or perhaps, still, remains unaware.). May He forgives me, for tightly closed my heart to the Truth. He is The Most Merciful…

Now, hopefully that He fares me better…and lead me to the right way…and  now I’ve turned to Him. Repenting for all sins… and humbly relying on His guidances to guide me back to Him.

Another steps in re-constructing me… as a Muslim.

Hope to be loved by Him… and to Him I’m devoting myself… May He gives me degree of  strength to get through all the challenges in the future.


I’ve decided to re-write again.. and here’s my entrance. [ekceli this was my first “entrance”. I wrote this back years ago. Now, I’m trying to refreshing my memories of those days and any other days, which I made promises to Him. Seeking for His guidances. Living in current world ekceli really scares me enuff. Lotsa confusions and `unwanted choices’.

I’m not yet convinced to share everything that perplexed inside my mind, body n soul… May be bcos I often feel insufficient encouragement from the ppl around me… in fact in certain circumstances, I cant rely on otrs. [why?] 🙂

And I do feel sometimes.. that ppl are kinda boring to hear me. (or may be I’m wrong…forgive me). ;p  May be it is only me who “too-love” to `hear’ to otrs. Or may be I am too secretive, too passive. Am I?  Ha-ha. Now’s everything seems funny! 8)

In fact, it often happen that, I thought I’v found a person who I can trust most and who willing to hear me [sincerely]. But, things turn out to be different. Over and over again it’s actually wrong…or not-so-right  kot. Huhu

Or may be the person… is not yet available. Or perhaps, never exist. Pity me. 🙂 Wallahualam. But, Allah, He always present at any moments. May Allah forgives me.

Ah-ha! That would be the mistakes. May be I’m kinda too complex or demanding [uish? Naa..nope too much. ;p ] Whatsoever. Lessons that we need to learn from this `situation’ are,

As Allah swt says in Surah Dhariyaat:

فَفِرُّواْ إِلَى اللَّهِ

All we need to do is flee to Allah. As the Most Merciful, Allah always welcoming us. No matter how far we’v walked away from Him in the past. All we need to do is, to keep finding Him. And, to understand the mercy of Allah. Allah wants us to return to Him. Hence, when we are running (on going marathon until death), fleeing from something that we are scared, dont we ever forget that Allah is telling us to run towards him.

Human are not perfect. So do I. Imperfect human. Hence, by turning to human we might not get the satisfaction that we are actually need. Therefore, seeking Allah is the best way to fills in the loopholes in our heart(s). [somebody reminds me that heart is 5. So put `s’. 🙂 okay then.]

Allah would be the best for us to seeking for shelter and putting our trust. So,  I’m sharing most of `lafaz yang tersimpan’ with Him. Because, I trust that Allah is the key of all happiness. In this world and Hereafter. After all, He is the One that knows everything, and He is the One who will be the Judge in the End. And, His judgments, are none of the biasness but all perfect and fair evidences  presented before us and all creatures. Subhanallah…

What we need to always bear in mind is that the sin should be given up only for the sake of Allah, not for any other reason, such as being unable to do it, or being afraid of what people will say.

“… Seek the forgiveness of your Lord, and turn to Him in repentance…” [Surah Hud, 11:3]

Taubat [repentance] conveys a very deep meaning. It is more than mere saying or uttering for forgiveness. It was sometihing higher and over it.

Ya Allah, sesungguhnya Engkaulah sebaik-baik tempat mengadu…

Dia lah Maha Mendengar…

Maha Memberi ilham dan Petunjuk….

Ku hadir pada Mu Ya Allah… mendambakan kasih Mu…

Semoga Kau menerima ku yg lemah dan hina…

Sesungguhnya Allah lah yg Maha Mengetahui setiap isi hati…

memohon keampunan dari Mu atas segala kekhilafan…

Sesungguhnya aku berserah diri pada Mu…

Semoga peringatan ini dapat kita selami bersama dalam membentuk jati diri Muslimin@Muslimah sejati dalam diri. InshaAllah. Amin.



*Mohon maaf atas kelemahan bahasa dan bahasa Inggeris. Practice makes perfect. InshaAllah. 🙂


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